4:50 AM

The title speaks of the time and I am having a terrible time composing this post because I am using my qwerty phone which I really don’t admire a lot. I am also suffering from a bad wifi connection suddenly that I badly have to turn it off and on again.

So my post started with a rant, and when I planned to make this one I never really thought of what to put but I just told myself that I want to blog. So what it is then for me to write? Badumtsss

I have been on crisis mode, super crisis mode last week until now. It was a terrible week of financial consumption. I had fought over my mom about it and it pained me to just realized now how monstrous I had acted. I haven’t really been so patient. I let the fire burn another fire, but I also raise mine even if its me who’s wrong. I badly need an intervention. I have hurt my mom, indirectly. My words were too harsh and my thinking had become shallow.

image

Sis and mommy

I have totally forgotten that my mom is the best mom ever. She was the person who understands me more than anyone else. She was the strongest I believe. I know she’s not perfect but there’s one thing that make her like perfect, her infinite love to her daughters. I know that she will do everything for us without a sign of complain. She serves us without her bragging it and counting for return.

Yet, despite her that way, what had become of me? Why am I the opposite of her? Why do I complain? Why do I talk back?

Her birthday is coming and I heard her one day that she’s looking forward to it. But my crisis had worsen, I needed to save up. Worst case though, its already this Friday  I AM TOTALLY SAD BECAUSE I CANNOT GIVE AT ALL, I CANNOT EVEN GIVE HER THE THING SHE WANTED. She doesn’t ask most of the time, just this time she slipped. I just hope I can give her something. Sad story.

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